Desire and Guilt...
How do you love someone, intensely and with all your soul, and still allow them to see your desire for another person completely? How can you not feel that they will be threatened by the attractiveness to another person? That they will be hurt if the level of intensity, even for the *moment* is not the same. What do you do when they have shown jealousy or fear in the past? How do you balance the emotions and the desire.
It's different when there have nothing in common or I'll never see him again. Another matter entirely when it is someone that I might see again or they are similar in some way that is important. What happens when I react sexually in a way that I've never done before? (Tom mentioned this in some link, but I'm feeling too lazy to go find it right now!)
Sometimes it's just a matter of not relaxing completely when you play as a threesome. It would be easier if he could really show me how much he was turned on when I'm with another man. If he could tell me how much he loves it when I get excited by another, more than a physical sense. I worry about his emotions and his feelings. I think that mentally it holds me back.
He mentioned that he feels guilty when he plays with another woman. Because it doesn't excite me. I'm not turned on by watching him with another woman. It's not my thing. I'm thrilled that he has fun, but I wouldn't know how to let him relax any more.
These are issues we are still exploring.
by Nightstar
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